


For Her Own Good

by BasilHellward



Category: Dexter (TV)
Genre: F/M, Unrequited, Wordcount: 500-1.000, [walks into fandom 4 years late with Starbucks], dexter doesn't know what a crush is, one-sided Dexter/Lumen, s5 e05 'First Blood', very very vague mention of rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-29 03:20:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12622004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BasilHellward/pseuds/BasilHellward
Summary: Watching Lumen leave, Dexter can't help but feel as though he's lost something. An ally, a friend. Maybe more.





	For Her Own Good

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick thing I wrote after watching episode 5 of season 5. I've finished the season now and I'm so upset that Lumen left for real, I really liked her.  
> Any spelling mistake or grammatical errors are my own, please point them out so that they can be fixed! Enjoy :)  
> This work was originally titled 'Let Her Go,' and was re-titled on 18/11/17.

"You don't have to wait," Lumen says, nervously twisting her hands in her sleeves.

"I don't mind." Dexter leans down to place her luggage down on the floor. She doesn't have much, just what she came to Miami with. There was no last minute dash to the gift shop to buy garish fridge magnets and cheaply made t-shirts for her loved ones. She certainly didn't get any souvenirs for herself — Dexter doesn't doubt that her trip to Miami is one Lumen will never forget. He just hopes someday she can recover from it.

"I can pay you back for the ticket, I'll send you some money," she says, "except... I still don't know who to send it to."

She looks at him expectantly and, after a pause, Dexter finds himself saying, "Dexter Morgan," even knowing that it could be a mistake — and Dexter doesn't let himself make mistakes. But he doesn't feel like he's putting himself in any danger by letting Lumen know his name. The damage is already done, she already knows what he is. Might as well put a name to the monster. Besides, she's leaving and they'll likely never cross paths again, and somehow Dexter trusts Lumen even though he barely knows her. It's like he's caught in a magnetic field. 

He's not sure what it is. If this is what attraction feels like. He's never really felt attraction to anyone — not this quickly, anyway. It'd taken years with Rita, and he'd spent their whole marriage unsure of whether his feelings were genuine or just what he was _supposed_ to feel. What a normal person would feel. He'd only realized after she was gone that he did really, truly love her.

"And it's not necessary," he adds, mostly to distract himself from his train of thought. "Uh, the ticket"

She nods then shakes her head. Looking to the ceiling, she presses her lips together and blinks away the emotion that suddenly threatens to pull her under and send her to the floor in a fit of sobs. It seems she has no control over her emotions anymore. She lost that when her control over her body was taken from her and she's unsure if she'll ever get it back, never mind ever feeling okay again.

Taking a deep breath, she says, "I came to Miami for a fresh start," eyes now downcast, "somewhere warm..."

"You're doing the right thing," Dexter tries to reassure her but it's like there's something in the way of his learned behavior that's almost become second nature, something making him regress back to awkwardness and missed social cues. "Your parents will be... happy to see you."

"I tried to call them but I... I couldn't. What would I say?"

"Just give it some time." His mouth twitches, not sure if he's trying to smile encouragingly or cringing at his own weak attempt to comfort Lumen.

"I can't tell them what happened to me. I can't tell anyone. You're... the only one who knows."

"You have my number, call me if you need to talk about it," he says too quickly. This is all happening too quickly. The PA system announces the last call for Lumen's flight and Dexter feels like she's slipping through his fingers, unsure of why he feels that way at all.

"I should—"

"Oh, yeah." Dexter picks Lumen's bags up off the floor and hands them to her.

"Thank you," she says and she doesn't mean for the help with her luggage. 

She nods at him, lips pressed together in what could be a smile, then turns to go. Dexter feels a pull towards her and without realizing he's doing it, he leans forward to... to what? He doesn't know, but watching her leave he can't help but feel as though he's lost something. An ally, a friend. Maybe more.

But it's for her own good. If Lumen stays here, if she stays with Dexter, something bad will happen to her. She might be killed by the men who hurt her or lose herself to her own Dark Passenger that's just beginning to sink its claws into her. It's better she gets away before she becomes its slave, just as Dexter has. Lumen still has a choice where Dexter's was taken from him.

Dexter forces himself to take a few backward steps. "You're welcome," he says before he goes. She doesn't turn to acknowledge it, hasn't heard him, and maybe that's for the best, too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! If you have a minute, please leave a comment telling me what you thought, I'd love to know! If you don't have a minute, just leave some kudos ;)


End file.
